So I have an issue with making and keeping friends. I've been in Brandon almost 2 years, I made about 2 actual friends that I did anything with. One I don't do anything with anymore and the other one I can feel is starting to slip away.
Among a myriad of other things I won't get into b/c I'm going to try to keep this from being a whiny emo loser blog post, I go at friendships wrong since I little experience and knowledge of them. I try to move things along and develop them too quickly, all my focus is centred on one area you could say.
Maybe there isn't a problem here even. I'm quite paranoid since it happens to me all the time and usually things happen generally in the same way. I see and talk to her a lot at work (quick note- yes it's a she, no it's not a dating thing, no I don't like her, that's not what it's about) and then I'm inviting to hang out and do stuff all the time, she hasn't really wanted to do anything the last 2 weeks I can understand getting kinda sick of me.
Like I said, maybe it's nothing. She's tired all the time, works a lot the above reason etc. I basically wonder what the best course of action is, i should probly give her some space and not put anything forth for awhile but should I mention anything about this too her? i mean i would come like kind of a tool but i could talk about if its all too much since i have no clue with the friend thing.
Yeh, really no way of asking about this and trying to figure it in a butch manly way lol. If you actually read through this whole thing, I have new respect for you. Back to movies next time. Terminator: Salvation comes out next week....
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Friends... I'm pretty terrible at making friends with people. Sure, I get along just great with people I meet and the potential to be friends is there, but I don't put forth that extra bit of effort to call to make plans and whatnot.
The friends I did manage to make and keep were friends by association. We just hung out everyday anyway and kind of became friends because we were always around each other.
So when I meet a person I really actually want to be friends with and get to know and hang out with, all of a sudden I'm 13 years old at the school dance and too nervous to just ask to do something!!! That's my friends issue.
But on to you...
If you see each other at work all the time and are able to chat it up there, then I'd say don't bother calling her to hang out for a while unless you know of something super fun that's going on that you really don't want to miss and think she'll enjoy too.
Making friends with girls is way different than making friends with guys.
If she's tired all the time and doesn't feel like going out, maybe appeal to that side of her and ask her to come over to watch some movies you rented, instead of going to a movie theater. That kind of thing. Then there's no pressure to get dressed up and spend money and blah blah blah. When I'm feeling worn out, the last thing I want to do is get ready to go out somewhere. But movie night at a friends is a nice way to relax.
Most importantly, don't fucking stress about it!!! If you want, you can be ultra sensitive and ask her if she's alright. Maybe you can tell she's pretty stressed at work or something and call her out on it. Tell her if she doesn't come out for a beer her head will explode.
yeh no kidding eh, its weird trying to make guy friends b/c you don't want it to come across gay lol. its a whole different mind set.
But yeh, i think i was just over reacting. it's all me as usual.
Making friends is tough. Nobody does it easily. I know people who make lots of aquintances easily, and people you would sit and chat with if you saw them at the bar or at the grocery mart, but actual friends you invite over? Tough stuff.
In the four months that I've been in Grande Prairie I've been invited over to someone's house once to drink and watch and UFC.
I've gone out to movies and for drinks with people, but nothing much more beyond that.
Making good friends is tough. Personally, when I'm not making friends I get kind of bummed out about it, but that's normal. We all just want to fit in.
Play it cool, take Chelsea's advice, and you'll be golden. You're underselling yourself.
And remember, more people like Star Wars than you know. If you like Star Wars, and someone else in the room is wearing a Star Wars t-shirt, you can't go wrong on being friends with that person.
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